Tuesday 1 September 2015

1st September 2015

Love: In the last 24 hours I have been dwelling on rejection and recognising how it affects my relationships with people. As a result, I feel my task is to bring my ego to a place of such confidence that it can handle rejection; to a place where it is not even afraid of rejection.
Life: after work, I came home, had lunch and was watching BBC iPlayer when I heard rustling behind me. I turned around to find Mia tearing at a bag of paper and, having already been irritated by her, I lost my temper momentarily and went to hit her but caught myself just in time. I felt awful that I'd lost my temper and was about to take my frustration out on a poor defenceless animal who was doing nothing more than following her nature but I would've felt a whole lot worse if I had of hit her! I often wonder whether I am a suitable owner of a pet and today is a case in point. This evening I went to a party Clare and Sandra held at their house. On the way I stopped off at B&Q and got some advice on rendering my garden wall, ready for painting it. The assistant made it sound simple so I bought a bag of render and a trowel - which are still in the boot of my car, thinking about it! The party at Clare and Sandra's was a lovely affair! And the house was filled with lots of amazing women... and Joleen (private joke)! I really enjoyed it! Then, feeling a bit pooped, I left at 8:30pm and drove home. Once home I managed to coax Mia onto my knee, apologised for losing my temper with her and we had a cuddle. She's such a forgiving creature! I love her to pieces! <3
Career: today was back at work after the Bank Holiday weekend. It was great to be back! I'm so lucky to have a job I enjoy with people I love being with! It's just a shame I no longer get paid for it! :(
One Thing: it's a tough call to choose one thing that has made today a day worth living but I think I'm actually going to plump for buying the bag of render and trowel from B&Q because, in doing so, I'm facing up to a fear that I'm gonna mess this up! Life is too short to be held back by needless fears! There is nearly always a way around them if we can just look at the fear sensibly. So I'm glad I'm doing that and finding a way forward. :)